"Drive-By On Washington" to Thank Congress for Exempting "Illegals" from Auto Insurance Requirements

3/5/05 Press Release from The Partnership Machine, Inc.

	By Dave Leach (Dave Leach is listed in Marquis' "Who's Who in Media and Communications") Contact: Leach@Saltshaker.US, or Dave Leach, The Partnership Machine Inc.,137 E. Leach, Des Moines Iowa 50315.
	Spanish Translations by Gabriela G. Buenrostro, former newspaper and magazine journalist and writer, and former host Zero Radio Show in Mexico City. Contact her at: Gabriela@Saltshaker.US.
	Some 650 immigrants, some unauthorized, came to the State Capitol March 1 with the message that undocumented immigrants still have to drive, so the only effect of the law denying them licenses is that they now have to drive uninsured.
	(They opposed Iowa Code 321.182(1)(a), enacted in 2003, which required social security numbers to get a license. The law was upheld by the Iowa Supreme Court February 18, 2005. Eddie Mauro, representing 23 churches, organized the event to encourage passage of SSB 1171, sponsored by Senator Matt McCoy. They got support from Des Moines Police Chief William McCarthy, who would rather have police able to know who they are stopping. Senate Republican Leader Stewart Iverson thinks a driver's license might enable a non-citizen to vote, but the facts are there are already many non-citizens who are here legally, and who may have legal driver's licenses, who may not vote; and no ID is required, anyway, to register to vote. A social security number or a license is requested, but if the applicant refuses a computer generated "voter ID number" is entered. Starting January 2006, a license number or the last 4 digits of a social security number will be required, but 4 digits aren't enough for computers to validate. It is hard to imagine unauthorized immigrants caring so much about voting that they will risk federal prosecution by checking "I am a U.S. Citizen", but the point is that not having a driver's license doesn't make it any harder.)
	That's great! Let's do it again!
	But let's try a different message, a different strategy, a different place, and a different time.
	I think the message should be a warm "gracias".
	Undocumented immigrants should feel honored that lawmakers think they are such good drivers that they do not need insurance. I think it is rude to get mad at someone for complimenting you like that!
	I think the correct place would be Washington, where on Thursday, February 10, the House passed the Real ID Act, by 261-161, a bill that would order all the states to do what Iowa has done, or in 3 years their licenses wouldn't be any good for federal ID purposes, such as getting on a plane. If that bill passes the Senate, it won't matter what Iowa did. (It would do a lot more than that, like pay "bounty hunters" to track down immigrants.)
	So I think a better place is Washington, and the correct strategy is not a "march", but a "drive-by" on Washington.
	I think every undocumented immigrant whose state already prohibits drivers' licenses for them, causing them to drive uninsured, should drive to Washington on April 1 and "drive-by" their Congressmen around the Congressional parking lots as Congressmen are pulling in, getting out of their cars, and going to work. (Or whatever it is they do.) Then, when they look up, startled by what good drivers we are, we should just smile at them, to let them know how much we appreciate their kind gesture.
	I do urge caution, however.
	Since we are announcing this "thanks giving" trip ahead of time, it may be that some USCIS agents may take advantage of our warm gesture to arrest drivers for deportation. To minimize that risk, I recommend that all "drive-by" participants wear business suits and gringo masks.
	I think a better time would be April 1. Our nation honors this day as "April Fool's Day", much like the "Innocents' Day" which Mexicans honor on December 28. On April 1, Americans act foolish, and love to play tricks on each other, saying things they don't mean, just to fool each other.
	Not that we would do such a thing, however! No, no, our only reason for choosing this day is because what we feel is utter joy, and what better day to share it than a day when Americans are already in top humor from their successes in deceiving each other?!
	I do not want to pour cold water on our brother marchers.
	So why not do both? We can all "drive-by" as many Congressmen as we can startle -- er, greet, and then when the Congressmen are all safely inside, we can illegally park our cars and march!
	Now that we have that settled, our next step is to organize ourselves. If you will let us know you are coming, we will know how many cookies to bake. Or, beans to fry. However, we must do this wisely. We do not want to create a database which might enable the USCIS to suppress our right to thank our congressmen.
	So here's how you can contact us: on the internet, go to http://www.x.saltshaker.us, which is an anonymous discussion board. You can post your note telling how much you would like to thank your congressional representatives.
	The more people who write, the better mood that will put our congressmen in, because that will increase their expectation, every time a car drives by, that it might be another uninsured undocumented immigrant expressing his or her gratitude for the compliment of making a special exemption just for them, so they don't have to buy car insurance, so they will have more money to send to their families back home!
	Even if you don't think you can actually come, why not stop by and leave a note saying how much you appreciate your Congressmen, and you will try to make it if you get rich between now and then? We will fry up a scoop of beans for everyone who writes, just in case you come, and if it turns out you cannot, why, beans are even better rewarmed.
	I know you will not want to thank just your Congressmen, but everybody, for electing such wise Congressmen! So in addition, we should all send "thank you" cards to newspapers, and TV and radio stations, and of course to our Congressmen too! However, another word of caution: newspapers will want to know your address before they reprint your "thank you" letter or card. If you are undocumented, you don't want to publish a letter saying "I am undocumented, and I live at 1234 Anywhere Street." Some people just don't know how to receive a compliment. So instead of writing yourself, you should get friends to write for you.
	There are some who ask me, "Me, are you serious?" My answer to them is always the same: "Anyone who can take seriously a bill that prohibits undocumented immigrants from getting drivers' licenses and insurance can take ME seriously."